Connecticut Destigmatized - Alissa Goldberg, LMSW

Alissa Goldberg, LMSW | email

Why do you do what you do?

My name is Alissa Goldberg and I am a DBT Therapist. 

I primarily work with individuals who struggle with big emotions which often results in intense urges to relieve or avoid these emotions. Many of my clients meet criteria for Borderline Personality Disorder.  Many of my clients are also adopted. Statistics show that about 20% of those diagnosed with BPD happen to be adopted. So, what do these two groups have in common? Fear of abandonment & shame.

When working with individuals with intense emotions and individuals who were adopted, I often use a Dialectical Behavior Therapy and Prolonged Exposure perspective. I prefer to check the facts, (which also happens to be one of my favorite skills) when coming to a conclusion.  Willingly participating in what Dialectical Behavior Therapy and Prolonged Exposure has to offer, the fact is, people are more likely to reach their life worth living.

How are you making the world a better place?

I don’t know if I am making the entire world a better place, but, I definitely try and help each of my clients  make their world a better place. I help them unlock skills they already have and then offer them new skills to make their world more bearable and hopefully, more enjoyable. This helps them move further in life and gives them the opportunity to make the world a better place. So in a sense, I suppose I do help make the world a better place.

What are your thoughts on the stigma around mental health and what solution(s) do you have to destigmatize it?

People who struggle with BPD are often misunderstood. I hear people refer to them as “manipulative” when in reality they are actually trying to communicate their emotional pain, they just aren’t communicating it effectively. 

If we approach people’s impulsive behaviors with curiosity instead of judgement and ask ourselves what are we missing… then maybe we would be more open to the idea that, for example, alcohol is their coping skill to deal with their emotions. Once we can understand more about how each individual is managing their emotions, then maybe we can begin addressing the root cause of the particular coping strategy.   I like to believe that less judgment and more compassion will ultimately decrease stigma. 

When a child who was adopted is having an emotional breakdown, and we approach them with curiosity instead of our own interpretations and assumptions, then maybe we can begin addressing the root cause of the emotional breakdown. And maybe then, there would be a decrease in the stigma.

How do we reduce stigma and the unjustified shame? We approach with curiosity instead of judgement.  

What would you like to bring to our attention at this time?

I would like to bring attention to a fabulous organization of which I am so honored to be a part. The National Education Alliance for Borderline Personality Disorder is an essential resource for families, individuals in recovery, and professionals. NEABPD specifically runs a program called Family Connections which is a free program that focuses on the needs of family members of those diagnosed with BPD. https://www.borderlinepersonalitydisorder.org/family-connections/

What is the best way for people to contact you to learn more?

I work with three fabulous psychologists at Guilford Psychological Services in Guilford, CT. We are all trained in empirically supported therapeutic approaches. We come from the mindset that compassion and empathy, in combination with empirical science, is the key to successful and effective therapy. This blend and balance is what makes our team unique. For more information on my team: www.guilfordpsych.com

I can be contacted by email at agoldberg@guilfordpsych.com